Penny's Travels

Time is a Traveller – Choices and Remembering With Kindness

“We can let the circumstances of our lives harden us so that we become increasingly resentful and afraid, or we can let them soften us, and make us kinder. We always have the choice.” Dalai Lama

Penny with kids Myanmar

Remember that “time is a traveler” so value the  special moments as you live them

We have all been there at some stage in our lives when we finally make the decision to move on, either in a personal relationship, job or traveling. It’s hard at first to even consider such a decision and you try to remind yourself of all the great times you had, sharing, exploring and creating wonderful memories which you felt would last forever; new countries, cultures and cities with photographs to go with them.  But after a while you begin to realize those experiences are now just that… memories, which have the ability to make you smile but also shed a warm, salty tear.

People and places don’t always stay the same and we cannot expect them to either. I cannot expect someone, who I considered to be my best friend and confident, to still value our relationship, just as much as I cannot expect those wonderful people from a small village in Sri Lanka to be always so open and friendly and invite every photographer who happens to stumble out of the jungle and interrupt their morning prayers, to share breakfast with them.  I cannot expect that kind Buddhist monk, who took me home while in Myanmar, to do the same for every hurt, lost and frightened female he happens to find on Mandalay Hill, just as I cannot expect the country itself to remain in some ways, naive and innocent when the bus loads of tourists converge on this “hot” new destination. 

Time is also traveller and it should be used wisely. People make choices everyday which impact on the lives of others. How they feel today does not necessarily mean they will act or feel that way forever. I cannot hold back time and I cannot expect it of others. All I have now are my photographs to recall special times – when it stood still and perfect for me.

I know people and situations change, but I will not let the bad memories make me resentful and afraid to make choices about moving on and creating new experiences with people and places unknown. I will  strive to value and fully appreciate the moments of my life as I live them. I will do my best to accept the changes that are unavoidable. I will resolve to move forward with hope and enthusiasm. Above all, I remember with kindness those important, special people I met along life’s journey and know I have made the right choice. 

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Penny Frederiksen

About Penny Frederiksen

Penny enjoys writing for a variety of blogs and magazines where she hopes to inspire readers to travel and explore the world. She is a regular contributor to publications in Russia, The United Kingdom, and South East Asia. Penny lives in rural Australia and her love affair with travel and photography started at a very young age..the National Geographic Magazines at her local dentist! ” I loved the wonderful stories and photographs – they brought history and culture alive.” Penny’s independent, solo travel started about 10 years ago when she realized all her friends had no interest in photography and getting into the backstreets and villages of Asia. She enjoys traveling to exotic locations each year both on photography tours and by herself, showing other women that with planning and confidence, they too can visit worldly destinations on their own. Some of her most recent destinations include Sri Lanka, Cambodia, Vietnam, UAE, Turkey, India, Nepal, and Myanmar. “Travel makes me step outside my comfort zone and get a better perspective of the world around me”

22 thoughts on “Time is a Traveller – Choices and Remembering With Kindness”

  1. Very nice and thoughtful piece Penny. Something for each of us to bear in mind.

  2. Thank you Penny for some really important thoughs.Especially when travelling a place will never be the same as the first time you visited it. Not only the place itself ant it’s people might have changed, but also you who are revisiting the area.

    • Thank you so much for your kind comments. In 2012 and 2014 we had plans to visit Myanmar, however these were cancelled in circumstances beyond my control. Thankfully, I have been fortunate enough to now travel to Myanmar twice in 2015 and each time I have come away with fond memories and of course, some wonderful photographs. Time moves on and as you have pointed out, I probably have as well.

  3. I really feel this… it’s not often I come back to a place.. it’s always new though when I do… I’ve even had a few spots that I really didn’t like or had awful experiences in that for work purposes I was brought back to expecting it to be bad and found them to be marvelous…. sometimes we get those magic moments when all lines and and sometimes we don’t… I think its the mix of all experiences that make for the best lessons on life and travel.. 🙂

    • Thank you Anjuli for taking the time to comment on my post. I agree with you that a mixture of experiences are the best lessons on life and travel. If we did not know and experience the tough times of broken friendship and death, then how could we ever value love and birth, or even something as simple as a beautiful sunrise. I consider my life has been most fortunate and I have many things to be grateful for but I will always remember those special people and moments which made it so.

  4. I can totally relate with this! My travels wouldn’t have brought me so far if I wouldn’t be such an optimistic person who sees the good in everything. I’m now in Arctic Norway where it’s cold and dark on the road and then I’m just so thankful when I’m invited by a lovely family to stay over night. And then for a few moments when seeing how the kids play around in their cozy home I get wistful and want to be part of that family. But then I throw myself out and I’m just so happy to be on the road again and to move on to explore new places and run into more heart-warning encounters.

    • Those heart-warming encounters have an ever lasting effect Stevie. It is then up to us, as travelers and just as humans for that matter, to pass it on. Thank you for your comments.

  5. Nicely said, seeing and experience new thing and new people are so important to our well being and growth as a human. Keep it up.

  6. Beautifully and honestly written as always Penny. I know the heartache and sometimes guilt of making difficult choices all too well having been married for 20 years to my first wife. Sometimes people come into your life that you just can’t let go. I’m a very different person now to what I was back then and nearly 100% for the better as I’m with my true soulmate now.

    • Thanks Nigel for your comments. I have had a few emails now about this post and what it means to different readers. As long as people can relate to it on their personal level then I have achieved what I set out to do.

  7. Beautifully written piece and couldn’t be more timely for me to read. I recently made quite a difficult decision to turn down a job in a place I had grown to love. There were many reasons that influenced my decision but it was a really tough call. Part of me still yearns to be there but another part of me feels it is best for me to move on.

    • Thank you for your comments Nikki. It is very hard to move pass that little stone in your heart which asks, “what if” and it sounds as if you have made the right choice. I don’t think the stone ever vanishes, it just gets a little smaller and the edges are not so sharp.

  8. Thank you for such a wonderfully written and thoughtful post Penny. This topic has been much on my mind lately, so your timing is perfect. I am so grateful for all the amazing people, places and experiences I’ve had in this lifetime. I will always carry those memories in my heart. The more challenging experiences do indeed provide necessary context for the good ones, but that definitely doesn’t mean they’re easy to go through. It took me a few difficult lessons the past few years to really understand that we can’t ever go back. Not really. But in going forward with optimism and an open heart, I feel truly like the possibilities for growth and rich experience are endless.

    • Thank you Dale for taking the time to read and then comment on my post. I try to see the good in people and experiences. I remind myself of that lovely quote, “Yesterday’s the past, tomorrow’s the future, but today is a gift. That’s why it’s called the present.”

      • You are most welcome Penny. I agree that it’s so important to try and see the good in all people and experiences even when they sometimes seem challenging or confounding. Some of the best experiences and lessons I’ve had in this lifetime came to me this way even if I didn’t see it right away. Being present is indeed so important as you point out. You can’t change the past and tomorrow is… well tomorrow.

  9. I really love this. Beautifully written and very true!

    • When you write, you don’t know if others will identify with what you are trying to say. As others have pointed out, this article is pretty deep!Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to comment on my post.

  10. It’s only now that I read this post of you and found it so beautiful. It’s not always easy to let things go even when your mind already knows you have to. Your words here contain lots of wisdom and I guess I take them with me and remember them when I have a hard time letting things go. I am still so happy I met you that day in Myanmar. It certainly is one of the best memories of my trip through South East Asia and always remember that time with kindness.

    • Thank you so much Ellis for your lovely comments . We certainly did have a wonderful time in Myanmar and I still laugh at some of the things we managed to get up to..snake bathing and kitten hugging!

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